| -- End Ad Box ---> | | | | others have become more important with the |
| Why are certain persons more successful than others | | | | introduction of information technology and the ability |
| in their personal lives and in their professional | | | | to trade goods and services in cyberspace. True |
| environment? Some are perhaps very successful at | | | | globalization has probably already occurred in |
| their homes, having good relationships with their | | | | cyberspace where a global 24 hour economy has |
| spouses and children, but having many communication | | | | been created where everybody is exchanging goods, |
| problems in their office: problems with bosses, but | | | | services and information all over the world. |
| good relationships with co-workers or vice versa, | | | | Everybody has become a customer! It is important |
| good relationship with the bosses, but conflicts with | | | | to look at the needs of others as your customer. |
| other managers and subordinates. Others again are | | | | This marketing concept was first used in transactional |
| having good relationships at the office at the | | | | settings, but was introduced in learning organizations |
| expense of their marriages and family life: too much | | | | and now has become an important concept in all |
| time is being spent at the office and the family at | | | | corners of life. |
| home is being felt ignored and left behind. | | | | The issue of discovering the interests of others has |
| The root cause of the problem is communication or | | | | even been infiltrated by non-scientific |
| to be more exact: effective communication. It is | | | | tools’ like astrology, numerology and tarot |
| actually surprising that a lot of communication is going | | | | cards. Before the discovery of these tools, one was |
| well most of the time. However, if a communication | | | | still utilizing (and still is utilizing) many scientific tools |
| problem happens, the question: what went wrong? | | | | offered by psychologists ranging from |
| Usually remains an unanswered question. There are | | | | psychoanalysis, conversation analysis, transactional |
| plenty of books, articles and websites dedicated to | | | | analysis and the sort resulting in various therapies |
| the problems of communication. Some give scientific | | | | which might be effective depending on the willingness |
| evidence of communication barriers and obstacles, | | | | of the buyer to take it seriously or not. |
| but leave finding practical solutions to the reader. | | | | How can one discover the interests of others? This |
| More practically oriented recipes are difficult to | | | | requires a proactive approach from both parties. Two |
| implement due to lack of time and practice. For | | | | strategies might be helpful. The first strategy is called |
| example the trait assertiveness: it has become | | | | the PAIR approval strategy: Placate (listen, |
| common knowledge that it is important to be | | | | empathize, respond with concern); Attend (to the |
| assertive in daily life. But how can one be assertive if | | | | other); Investigate (circumstances details of issue); |
| he or she is introvert by nature? On top of | | | | Resolve (decide on action to take). The second |
| personality (extrovert versus introvert), there is the | | | | strategy is called the five-step method: listen, |
| issue of culture: people from certain countries are | | | | respond, decide on action, take action and follow up. |
| simply less extrovert than from other countries. | | | | DISTURBING FACTORS |
| Wouldn’t is be extremely useful to have a | | | | The third element of effective communication is |
| simple formula of effective communication which can | | | | probably the most difficult one: how to eliminate |
| be used in all circumstances? I think the following | | | | disturbing factors or how to overcome |
| formula would be helpful: | | | | communication barriers. There are basically six types |
| EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION= | | | | of barriers between people communicating with each |
| SELF-INTEREST + INTEREST OF OTHERS — | | | | other: differences in perception, incorrect filtering, |
| DISTUBING FACTORS | | | | language problems, poor listening, differing emotional |
| OR | | | | states, and differing backgrounds. In order to |
| EC = SI + IO — DF | | | | overcome these barriers, one must be willing to avoid |
| Let’s look at the three elements of this | | | | selective perception, condense messages to the bare |
| formula. | | | | essentials, use specific and accurate words possible, |
| SELF-INTEREST | | | | always verify your interpretation of what’s |
| When people communicate, self interest is probably | | | | been said, be aware of the feelings that arise in |
| the main reason for communication. One is far more | | | | yourself and in others as you communicate, and |
| interested in his or her own interest than in the | | | | attempt to control them. |
| interests of others. The above formula can actually | | | | Communication barriers also exist within organizations. |
| be simplified even further by simply stating that | | | | Although all communication is subject to |
| communication is equal to self-interest. For this | | | | misunderstandings, business communication is |
| reason, communication is rarely effective because | | | | particularly difficult. Barriers can be caused by: |
| one is not trying to find a common ground in | | | | information overload, message complexity, message |
| interaction processes but merely seeking a way to | | | | competition, differing status, lack of trust, inadequate |
| fulfill certain short-term interests. The most important | | | | communication structures, incorrect choice of |
| problem in communication is probably asymmetry. | | | | medium, closed communication climate, unethical |
| The two parties in question are having different | | | | communication, inefficient communication, and physical |
| agendas and different interests which is further | | | | distractions. |
| complicated by asymmetries of, knowledge, power | | | | There are three distinct moments which can cause |
| and authority. For this reason, negotiation skills and | | | | many communication barriers in organizations; during |
| tactics have become a very important trait of | | | | negotiations, when dealing with customers, and |
| modern civilization. In the old days, physical strength | | | | holding meetings. When you are negotiating, |
| was the determining factor to force the other party | | | | psychological barriers may arise. These psychological |
| to compromise. Thanks to civilization, consensus can | | | | barriers may be yours or may belong to the other |
| now be reached by communica!tion. This civilizing | | | | party. Be aware that people carry some of these |
| process is basically a shift from a command and | | | | barriers and listen’ for their effects. Look |
| control communication culture to a negotiating | | | | for signs of them in the other party (and in yourself) |
| and persuasion culture. | | | | and use your communication skills to ease or lower |
| This shift has resulted in a greater emphasis on the | | | | these barriers. Dealing with customers, in turn, can be |
| ability to effectively communicate verbally and | | | | very hard because some customers are hard to |
| non-verbally with each other. This also implies better | | | | please and difficult situations can arise. If a high level |
| education in which development of dialogue skills has | | | | of service is not provided, the result will not only be |
| become the backbone of modern education. One is | | | | loss of business, but often an increase in the number |
| at a young age already required to be able to | | | | of difficult and even abusive customers. They have |
| express their thoughts clearly in class presentations, | | | | not yet been lost. Deal with them professionally. The |
| essays, reports and not to mention in theses of | | | | negotiating process, finally, demonstrates a |
| various sorts in tertiary educational settings. | | | | fundamental tension between the claiming and |
| INTEREST OF OTHERS | | | | creating of value. Value cla!imers view negotiations |
| The interest of others has probably been the most | | | | purely as an adversarial process. Each side stride tries |
| important issue in many textbooks about effective | | | | to claim as much of a limited pie as possible by giving |
| communication. The ability to listen, to get and give | | | | the other side as little as possible. Each party claims |
| feedback, to control anger (anger | | | | value through the use of manipulative tactics, forcible |
| management), conflict resolution, stress | | | | arguments, limited concessions, and hard bargaining. |
| management, etc., have been discussed in great | | | | Value creators, in contrast, call for a process which |
| lengths by many authors, scholars, management | | | | results in joint gains to each party. They try to |
| trainers, etc. | | | | create additional benefits for each side in the |
| The problem is accommodating the interests of | | | | negotiations. |